INTRODUCTION

EARLY IN THE 21ST CENTURY (2:55 AM, in fact), the history of Planet Earth took a left turn into oncoming traffic. ALIEN traffic. A million, zillion hostile spaceships descended on mankind and blasted his cities into chili powder. Then they left.

SHOCKED BY THE IMPOLITENESS of this alien horde, an alliance of Galactic powers sent emissaries to Earth in order to repair the damage as best they could. This alliance (Known as Galactic Alliance Against the Alien Horde, or GAAAH), needed allies in their ongoing space war, and helped mankind back to its feet.

WHEN MANKIND STOOD UP, however, it found a leg missing: over 60% of all the humans on Earth had been killed in the attack. Since GAAAH scientists had the ability to bestow high intelligence onto lesser species, it was decided to use some of Earth's other inhabitants to restore the number of humans lost. The dolphins wanted nothing to do with this, but were glad to learn there would now be 60% less pollution in their water.
THE GORILLAS, ON THE OTHER HAND, were more than happy to bask in a higher I.Q. pool in exchange for their services…

If you enjoyed this chapter, please return on June 1, 2006 for chapter 2!